A Complicated Plan
by Silverflame4761
Summary: Determined to break up Harry & Lucius’ wedding, Sirius and Draco pretend to be a couple. But their plan backfires when everyone else is thrilled! In response to Nimori's challenge.


TITLE: A Complicated Plan  
  
AUTHOR: Silverflame4761  
  
PAIRINGS: LM/HP, SB/DM, other minor pairings  
  
RATING: R  
  
FEEDBACK: Silverflame4761@yahoo.com  
  
DISCLAIMER: If you think I own the Potterverse, then I want what you're on.  
  
SUMMARY: Determined to break up Harry & Lucius' wedding, Sirius and Draco pretend to be a couple. But their plan backfires when everyone else is thrilled!  
  
NOTES & WARNINGS: In response to Nimori's challenge on the HarryxLucius Yahoo! Group. This story contains heavy slash. Don't like, don't read.  
  
ARCHIVING: Anyone is welcome to archive, but please contact me first.  
  
***  
  
Harry James Potter and Lucius Aidan Malfoy request the honour of your presence at their marriage on Saturday, the twentieth of December, two thousand and three, at six o'clock in the evening.  
  
Malfoy Manor  
  
***  
  
"Tell me again why you had to have your bachelor party at a gay bar?" Ron Weasley grumbled.  
  
Harry sighed. "Because I'm marrying another man."  
  
"That would make him gay," Seamus chimed in helpfully. "Gay wedding, gay bar, not a big leap of reasoning."  
  
Ron glared. "I KNOW he's gay, you big flaming homo. I just don't see why the bachelor party has to be at a gay bar when some of us are most definitely NOT GAY!"  
  
"Tell you what, Ron," said Harry, "if you stop complaining, you can have your bachelor party at a straight bar and I won't say a word."  
  
Dean jumped on that immediately. "Ron's having a bachelor party? I didn't even know he was getting married!"  
  
Blushing, Ron punched Dean in the shoulder. "I'm NOT! Or at least, not yet. I haven't asked Cho yet."  
  
Neville finally piped up. "But are you going to? Because in one week the only unmarried guys in our group will be you and Seamus."  
  
Laughing at the horrified look on his best friend's face, Harry pushed open the door to The Tight End. It only took him a few seconds of looking around before he spotted his fiancée's platinum blonde hair glinting in the dim light. Harry smiled as he made his way over to the group sitting in the corner of the room.  
  
Five men sat there, as unalike as humanly possible. Remus Lupin, with a calm, peaceful smile. Severus Snape, face expressionless and unreadable as always. Draco Malfoy, sulking and looking exactly like the spoiled little brat he was. Sirius Black, seemingly ready to kill someone at the slightest provocation. And Lucius Malfoy, uncharacteristically happy.  
  
Harry pounced on the latter, straddling his lap and kissing him soundly. Sirius growled. Draco pouted. Remus smiled. And Snape- well, Snape was Snape.  
  
When they finally broke apart, Lucius said reprovingly, "You're late, Mr. Potter."  
  
"So punish me," Harry purred.  
  
While Lucius proceeded to do so, the rest of the Gryffindor quintet joined the table, Ron looking distinctly uncomfortable and pointedly looking anywhere but at the happily snogging couple.  
  
Sirius abruptly pushed his chair back. He just couldn't take this anymore. "Excuse me," he said shortly, and all but ran in the opposite direction. Remus frowned after him.  
  
Draco Malfoy got up as well. "I'll be right back." He then walked in the same direction Sirius had taken. Snape watched him go, gears shifting in his analytical mind. He and Remus shared a Look across the table that nobody else saw.  
  
***  
  
Sirius bent over the sink in the bathroom, gripping the edge of the counter tightly. He couldn't help it. Every time he saw his godson and that- that THING together, he lost it. Harry deserved so much better. And it wasn't as if he didn't have hordes of good-looking young men waiting eagerly in the wings. Sirius just didn't understand.  
  
Draco swept into the room in a huff. His discontent was obvious to anything on two legs- except, apparently, his father and that Potter idiot. How could his father DO something like this to him? As if what had happened with his mother wasn't enough, Lucius had to go and get engaged to his archrival? Potter was going to be his stepfather, for crying out loud!  
  
Startled from his daze by Draco's entrance, Sirius turned to look at him. The younger man stood right in front of him and said plainly, "We have to put a stop to this."  
  
Eyeing the boy warily, Sirius wondered what he meant. "What do you mean?" he asked. Sirius always said exactly what he was thinking.  
  
Draco made an impatient noise in the back of his throat. "The wedding, you idiot. We can't allow the wedding to happen."  
  
"And why not?" Sirius said stubbornly.  
  
"Oh, come off it, Black. You're not any happier about this than I am. You don't want them together, I don't want them together. So let's break them apart."  
  
"Exactly how do you plan on doing that?"  
  
"That's the problem," Draco sighed. "I have no idea. That's where you come in."  
  
"Why do I have to think of an idea?"  
  
"Because you're the rash, impulsive one. You'll come up with some foolish, asinine plan that shouldn't work but actually does. That's what you DO."  
  
"It is not!" Sirius said indignantly. Although, come to think of it.  
  
Draco observed him smugly. Black always let his thoughts parade right across his face. How the man had survived years of running from the Dementors was a mystery.  
  
"Fine," said Sirius grudgingly. "I admit it. You're right."  
  
"I always am."  
  
"You are not."  
  
"Yes, I am."  
  
"No."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"No."  
  
"Yes."  
  
Sirius threw up his hands. "AARGH! You're so bloody INFURIATING!"  
  
"I know. Did you think of a plan yet?"  
  
"N- wait a minute!" Sirius grinned evilly. This would put the brat in his place.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I've thought of something."  
  
"What?"  
  
"We need to show Harry and Lucius that their relationship is a bad idea, right?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"They're so far apart in age, they come from totally different backgrounds, they have radically different world views-"  
  
"GET TO THE POINT!"  
  
"What if there was another couple just like them? A couple that could show them, in vivid detail, how wrong their relationship is?"  
  
"Who?"  
  
"Who do you think?"  
  
Draco gaped. The man was out of his mind. Absolutely, positively INSANE. "That's completely ridiculous," he sneered.  
  
Sirius grinned. "That's exactly why it will work."  
  
A slow smirk spread across Draco's face.  
  
"All right. You're on."  
  
***  
  
Next chapter: Will Sirius and Draco's plan work? How did Harry and Lucius get together in the first place? And what DID happen to Narcissa?  
  
Please R/R!! 


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